For years, I couldn't understand what happened to my finances every time I visited my family.
I would arrive home with good intentions and a healthy bank balance but by the time I left, I'd spent far more money than I'd planned. I felt emotionally exhausted, financially drained, and completely confused.
It happened over and over again…
Today, people often compliment me on my discipline - they see the books, the business, the travel, and the consistency. What they don't see is the support behind it.
When we're expanding, whether that's asking for more money, building a business, investing, or becoming more visible we often assume the biggest obstacles will be practical and that’s not true. The greatest challenge is often emotional.
For years, I believed that being good with money meant spending as little as possible. I thought every dollar I didn't spend was a dollar I'd saved.
My thinking changed when I lived in Chiang Mai, Thailand. When I lived out there I would often take a 12-hour overnight bus to Bangkok instead of paying an extra US$25 for a direct flight.
It isn't that you don't want success. It's that being seen doesn't feel safe. In my work, I call this the vow of invisibility. It's an unconscious promise many of us make in childhood to stay small because somewhere along the way we learned that visibility came with a cost.
This isn't about money or your bank account; it's about living with the constant feeling that money could disappear at any moment. Repeatedly checking your bank account is how that fear expresses itself.
