All tagged fear of being seen
The child who learned to hide may eventually become an adult who doesn't ask for the promotion. Who doesn't speak in the meeting. Who doesn't tell people about their accomplishments. Who doesn't negotiate their salary. Who doesn't take credit for their ideas.
For some of us, the fear of being seen has deep roots because we watched our parents and other family members experience criticism, jealousy or rejection when they became visible. It can cost business opportunities and money.
When we're expanding, whether that's asking for more money, building a business, investing, or becoming more visible we often assume the biggest obstacles will be practical and that’s not true. The greatest challenge is often emotional.
It isn't that you don't want success. It's that being seen doesn't feel safe. In my work, I call this the vow of invisibility. It's an unconscious promise many of us make in childhood to stay small because somewhere along the way we learned that visibility came with a cost.
